Perhaps the modern mother needs not only a fairer deal, but help in relinquishing the temperament of obsessive productivity. Rather than managing our children, we need to relax into their company, take pleasure from the tiny transactions of baby-days, the pleasures of play. We seem to have lost a capacity for tenderness and time-wasting, obsessed with doing more than feeling, distracted by a society that measures purpose in little boxes and success by how quickly they can be ticked off. Has the modern mother lost the ability to find in her mothering the humour, the adventuring, the mystery of that experience?
From an article by Joanne Murray-Smith, reprinted in the book ‘Buddhism for Mothers of Small Children’ by Sarah Napthali
It’s the last day of the year, which means in the next week we’ll be bombarded by ‘New Year, New You’ and goal-setting advice. Which is absolutely fine if you’re using it to build your business or lose a few pounds.
But one of the unique challenges we face as both business women and mums is balancing the organised, target-driven aspects of our lives with the chaotic worlds of our little children. It’s a tricky line to walk along and I know there will be times in 2011 when I slip into ‘managing’ my toddlers. Even though it’s frustrating and pointless for all of us!
Sarah Napthali says she’s printed off this quotation and stuck it on her fridge with the words humour, adventuring and mystery underlined. I think I might do the same!
photo credit:PinkStock Photos! /D Sharon Pruitt
2 Replies to “Humour, Adventuring and Mystery”
I can really identify with that … I very occasionally find myself thinking how much more I could achieve if I didn’t have children and then feel very guilty! It’s a tough juggling act especially as a single parent. However, its mostly better for them, as if I worked for someone else Id have to leave them as breakfast club and after-school club everyday!
I’m a little ashamed to admit that I also sometimes think about how much more I could achieve if I didn’t have children! But I’m pretty sure that if I hadn’t had children, I’d still be in my old job. So however hard this might be sometimes, I know my children gave me the push I needed to get me into self employment. And like you I’m sure this will be better for them than if I worked for someone else.